Death of Us
by pennedbyemily
Summary: " It wasn't easy, being in love with who they were." - When Peter gets hurt, Gwen and Pepper talk about the difficulties and worries of having superhero boyfriends. Set during some undetermined time in the future where Peter has joined the Avengers.


**A/N: **I'm not sure where this came from, really. But huzzah!: My first Marvel fanfiction. It's a little wordy and jumps around, but I've never written either of these characters before, so I really wanted to get both of their points of view in while attempting to make the story flow. I hope you enjoy, because I would probably die of happiness if this actually happened (though I would much prefer they also have conversations not pertaining to men because they're both ingenious women who could offer eachother so much more than that).

* * *

The Avengers had been called in on a mission involving the containment of a mix of a leak in SHIELD technology, as well a the Iron Man technology which was in slight jeopardy, even despite the clean slate protocol wiping out 95% of it, so though Iron Man's involvement in worldly affairs had slowed down lately, understandably, he wanted to be involved.

Gwen was still uneasy about the thought of Peter being part of some huge world-saving team; Gwen's loss still felt like an open wound despite the time that had passed, and she still couldn't get rid of the images of Peter's chest ripped open by Dr. Connors's _claws_ (which had thankfully been the worst so far shy of the one time she had to give him stitches herself because Peter + fidgety web shooter + guy with a knife hadn't worked out as he'd planned) out of her mind every time he went out to fight the bad guys, leaving her with the aching thought that _she couldn't lose him, too. Please, not him, too_.

(She didn't mind, however, the people involved. Natasha and Clint, though reserved, were still there and nice enough — Natasha even teaching her a few self-defense basics upon Peter's request (which he totally got in trouble for later because trying to go up against a real-life assassin with green-belt skills was utterly terrifying, even knowing she would go easy on her) — and Steve was just so sweet to everyone that she couldn't help but enjoy his presence. All three had amazing skills in battle, which she had even gotten a chance to see some of while Peter (so he obviously included her) was debriefed about the incident in New York that initially brought the Avengers together; This being something that Peter and Gwen had only heard rumors about when school was finally re-opened and most news reels and YouTube videos had been destroyed and replaced with barely any public footage of the events still out there for them to have any confirmation other than the fact that Iron Man and Captain America were somehow involved — an astounding example of damage control, (that SHIELD and the brilliant Pepper Potts had collaborated on) Gwen noted. So their presence with Peter, as well as Tony and Bruce's, eased her worries slightly. She especially enjoyed Tony and Bruce, despite Tony's initial response to a "very nice brain with a very nice body attached" such as herself, and she loved talking to someone on a higher intellectual level than she and Peter, learning from two renowned and certified geniuses from simple conversations and even being able to aid them with their "science experiments" — which she felt was nowhere near a worthy term to be used to describe the things they were working on...)

Still, unfortunately, she couldn't help but worry every time they went on a mission, and here she was once again, worrying. Though she got to see most of it, thankfully, through JARVIS. It was something that she really enjoyed about the missions Tony partook in, the not-so-authorized streaming of the mission that JARVIS sent back to Pepper to assure that he was 100% able to handle what was happening. Gwen didn't know exactly what that meant or what would happen if he wasn't, but she could only assume. Any audio, however, would be lowered unless there was some kind of distress or Pepper was directly addressed. Remembering her company, Gwen looked up from her work momentarily to see the other woman typing away at her laptop while also taking a break every few keystrokes to type something into the blackberry that Gwen had been so accustomed to seeing.

She had read a few articles about Pepper Potts prior to them meeting, and all she really took from them was that the saying that "behind every great man there's a great woman" rang true, and this was only more proven through the few interactions she had seen between her and Tony, even the ones in which she would have preferred to not have, having walked in on a private moment or two after she and Peter had been given a key, or seeing them through the glass that (ineffectively) closed his workshop from the rest of his house - but it was always followed by her reminding him this or that, to eat, about the SI meeting that he had to be involved at "yes even though I'm the CEO, _Mr. Stark_". It was as if he wouldn't run properly without her around, and honestly, she was slightly astounded by this. She had once mused that Pepper had run the company more-so than Tony even before her promotion, a fact that, apparently, was true from something Tony had once said while talking over buzzing gadgetry that would become an arc-reactor-powered web shooter for Peter. She had always considered Pepper Potts a kind of role model, being a fan of women in the Science industry generally, she had been in her top 5, but now that she got to see her in action she was probably in the top 2 (number 3 being Nettie Stevens, look it up); Marie Curie was a tough woman to beat. This was partially why they hadn't talked all that much. It had been tough for her to talk to Tony at first, he was _Tony Stark_, one of the smartest people alive (or ever), creator of a successful and eerily human-like AI and countless other inventions that made the world a better place, including Iron Man who had achieved world peace, (for like, a month, but it was still impressive). But he was so easy to talk to, especially after her and Peter had proven to be nearly fluent in what Steve had deemed "Gizmo Talk". Pepper, however, was intimidating, though she was sure it was unintentional. She was so _prim_ and _just business. _Iron Lady in more ways than one.

Glancing at the screen momentarily, Gwen saw that they seemed to have succeeded in retrieving most of what they needed, and were prepared to destroy the rest because Tony had strapped something to the side of whatever building it was that they were at - "Standard procedure," Peter had said. Filling her beaker with the liquidized "starkonium" to pour it into a small engine to test whether it would run. However, she wasn't that lucky because as soon as the volume rose, the beaker fell to the floor. It wasn't hard to hear an agonized scream over JARVIS's vice informing Tony that his torso had been impacted, but it hadn't been Tony's. In fact, Gwen knew it. "Peter" was all she could muster, as if she could somehow make him hear her, as if she could do something, but he was god-knows-where on a screen in pain and he wasn't making noise anymore.

Pepper jumped out of her seat at the sound, walking to the monitor and pressing a button on the screen before: "JARVIS, vitals". And suddenly everyone's heart beat, breathing rate, temperature, and blood pressure appeared on screen next to their picture, as well as injured parts of their bodies, and much to Gwen's horror, Peter's was all red and his heart beat was sickeningly slow. Touching another button on-screen, she said "Override no-call protocol due to emergency situations." - "Yes, Miss Potts" - and the line was ringing. Gwen felt sick looking at the screen, seeing mostly smoke, but also some blood and then - "Tony, what happened? Are you okay? Is Spider-Man okay?"

Static and then "I'm 100%, and okay, the impact hit the suit. Spider-Man is somewhere in this smoke, JARVIS is working on visuals as we speak" he said, and a distant 'got him' was heard and then 'Visual acquired'. "Spider-Man shot a web to pull someone out. I said I would, it might be a trap, but he was faster than me and the guy pulled him back into the range and..." his voice trailed off, or at least, to Gwen, because The Big Guy had a very-burned, mask-less (and mostly suit-less) Peter into Tony's view and oh god, she was going to be sick. Not him, not him, too. His heart beat picked up suddenly, and another, smaller, weaker, cry was heard from him and - where is the bathroom a trash can something - she couldn't watch this - how could he do this?

_Every day for as long as I can remember, my father has left every morning and he's put a badge on his chest, and strapped a gun to his hip. And every day for as long as I can remember, I haven't known if he was going to make it home_

_and then he didn't._

_And neither will Peter._

Retching, she had found the trash can.

"Tony, we have to get him out of here!"

"Track the nearest SHIELD base or military hospital or _anywhere_ that we can treat him because Banner is in no condition to do anything about it right now."

"JARVIS" Pepper said, and he was already on it. Turning to look at the girl behind her, Pepper couldn't help being in a similar position not too long ago, watching Tony fly into a _wormhole_ with a _missile_ (that she had found out later was a nuke, and no, it hadn't made her any less selfishly angry that he did it), something that haunted both of them to this day and caused so many more wounds than the minor physical ones Tony had endured. Retrieving a water, she handed it to her and led her to sit before she fell, which didn't look like it was too far off. "Drink" she said, simply, simple orders were easiest to follow, and she did. She hadn't ever been good at comforting anyone other than Tony, and that was mostly because Tony preferred a silent comfort, to be held or hugged or for her to just be. This wasn't a territory she was good at, and she didn't like not knowing what to do. Correction: She always knew what to do. "I'm not going to tell you he's okay, because you're aware that I know as much as you do, but I know that once Bruce comes back, he'll be in the best hands" she said, and looked at the girl who looked at her with an expression that was more unfathomable than the one th Pepper would use when Tony tried lines on her, a terribly impressive feat. And then, Gwen nodded, like she knew, but she closed her eyes right when Pepper could tell she was doubting.

"Part of me knew this would happen, you know? I knew he'd get hurt. I really tried to talk him out of it all" Gwen said, almost like she was defending her actions, her eyes snapping open to look at Pepper.

Pepper looked at her knowingly, understanding. "I tried to quit, when Tony started being Iron Man. He came home with bullet holes in his suit, and he was asking me to help him endanger himself. So I decided to leave" she said, and shook her head, almost chuckling at the thought, because she wasn't sure she'd be able to. SHe definitely wouldn't have been able to stay away, nor would Tony be able to let her.

"But you didn't." Gwen said, slightly less intimidated now as she realized that Pepper was opening up to her.

"But I didn't" she confirmed, and put her hand over the younger girl's, squeezing it slightly. "Because... for so long, Tony didn't have a purpose. Or he wouldn't make himself one. He was too busy with all of the... galavanting I'm sure you know about. But this, he knew that this is what he needed to do. That this was his purpose, to protect people, maybe even to protect people from all of the destruction 'The Merchant of Death' had caused; I'm sure that was a part of it" she explained, and Gwen looked down. She had never been an opposer of Stark Industries or, what she had always thought to be helpful, weapons that they created, but she had heard of everything that had happened without Tony's knowledge, that he was betrayed, leading the scandalous death of Obadiah Stane. She had just never taken into consideration that that was why Tony had become Iron Man. She thought it was solely because of the PTSD that the media had hyped up and tossed around so much, and had deduced that from his description of it. And though she was sure that was also part of it, the fact that he wanted to protect people from the weapons he produced made sense.

"Peter had other reasons in the beginning, I think. Even now, he goes out as Spider-Man to find the guy who killed his uncle... he was a block away. He saw him. He wasn't even Spider-Man, in the beginning. He was just Peter with his 'spidey powers' ready to bring the only kind of justice to the guy that he could think of. But then... he said he had to do this because he had helped create The Lizard; the formula he had given to Dr. Connors was what made it all possible. But now? Besides his attempt to avenge Uncle Ben, which are fewer and far between, he does it because he feels like he has a _responsibility_ to help because he has the means to. And I _hate it_" she said, but then, decided she didn't. She couldn't, not with the people that he helped having needed him to help them. Especially when her father wouldn't. Especially when no one else would or could. "But I love it. It's... just a part of him, now. And I love him. I just hate that he's always in danger, ranging from small to serious danger. All the time, every day." _Like today. _Suddenly, the image of Peter's charred flesh was fresh in her mind and she pulled her hand away from Pepper's and rubbed her eyes. "And there's nothing I can do most of the time," Gwen continued suddenly. "I know all of these things, I know how to do things, but when he goes and does something like this I'm helpless. _That's_ what I do hate" she said.

This was something else that Pepper was familiar with, something she always, always, felt when he went on missions like these. Or even smaller ones. She didn't know how to comfort Gwen. But she knew how to do everything. But she didn't. She couldn't even comfort herself about it. "Me, too" she admitted. Meeting her eyes again, she could see Gwen was surprised, but she didn't say anything about it. "Tony did something like this once" she continued, catching Gwen's attention. "You may have seen it. Maybe not, SHIELD cut the news pretty soon after it all happened, but plenty of people know what happened." And the memory was there. - "The Wormhole" she said, having seen it and heard about it, it was something that she thought to be true about what had happened that day - Pepper nodded. "He called me while he was flying" she said, her voice shaking. She hadn't talked much about it. to anyone. She was good at that, at avoiding. Recovering. Fixing. Damage Control. But not this.

It was Gwen's turn, now, and she placed her hand on Pepper's like before. "How did you handle it?" she asked.

"I yelled. At everyone. Told them to call SHIELD, to call the police, to call Tony" and Gwen could imagine it, in this kind of panic, seeing Pepper scream. Gwen certainly felt like she could right now.

"Miss Potts, Miss Stacy" JARVIS said, suddenly, jarring them from their conversation. Looking up, Gwen prayed to any deity she could think of that he wasn't going to follow that with 'I'm sorry to inform you.' "Mr. Stark and the other Avengers are on their way. Mr. Parker is stable, but understandably in pain. Dr. Banner is working on him as we speak."

* * *

It wasn't long until Gwen could see Peter, and Pepper couldn't help but smile when she saw them through the window of Peter's room. Feeling familiar sense of relief as she did when Tony showed up, almost unscathed. Someone wrapped their arms around her, kissing her cheek. Despite his fun and name-calling, Pepper knew she was glad he was okay, too. "You guys are going to kill us one of these days" she whispered, the "if you don't kill yourselves first" hanging in the air, though implied. And from then on, Pepper and Gwen always made it a point to talk during missions, and eventually, even became friends. It wasn't easy, being in love with who they were. But having someone who understood it was the best thing in the world.


End file.
